Then there are moms like you who do educate themselves. GREAT! But indeed there need to be more changes within the birth community. There need to be care providers who TRUST birth and moms. How is a mom to know if her careprovider is that way? Being educated is different than empowered and how a women is treated during her birth makes a huge difference.

I don’t know what to say, excpet I am sorry.

I just attended a birth as a doula with an OB I had never worked with, but from talking with the mom and working with other OBs from the same group, I thought things would be straight forward, that this OB trusted birth. But no, this OB did and said things that surprised me. I did what I could as a doula but it effected this birth.

So, I think I still need to support women in educating themselves, because I think that is an important step.

But I will continue to work and think about other ways I can help more women enjoy their births. It is so true, it is much more than just education!

Hugs!

And you are even more correct when you say that it shouldn’t be on the woman’s shoulders to make sure that she is treated kindly, fairly, and properly. That *should* be standard treatment. There should be *no* manipulation, *no* unnecessary procedures, and *no* overstepping of bounds. There are steps that pregnant women can take to help them have the birth they want, but even if they do nothing by way of preparation, that still does not give the doctors, nurses, or midwives the right to do whatever it is they want.

Thank you so much for writing this insightful post!
Kathy
womantowomancbe.wordpress.com

We are all vulnerable to the system and you are so right when you say, “no one size fits all”, there are so many variables.

I try to encourage women to listen to their instincts and look for support in others, and it’s our job as moms to help support one another. Things go wrong, there are insensitive doctors and the system often fails us, so we as moms can only do the best we can, blaming yourself for not knowing enough is a futile, no one can know everything.

Do what you feel comfortable with. If you’ve been a victim of bad doctors, bad medial decisions or bad treament try not to dwell on finding blame, particularly with yourself, try to move forward with a deep sense of love and caring for your beautiful baby, all other negative emotion is unhealthy.